Movie Review: SHARK ATTACK 3: MEGALODON

SHARK ATTACK 3: MEGALODON

2002
R

Shark Attack 3 is a 2002 thriller directed by David Worth that serves as a sequel to the 2001 film Shark Attack 2 despite not continuing that particular story. Instead, we're taken to the shores of Mexico where a beach-side resort starts to be plagued by a massive and supposedly extinct species of shark known as a megalodon. When resort security officer Ben Carpenter (John Barrowman) finds a shark tooth lodged in an underwater electric cable, he sets out to find the type of shark that left it behind. Unable to find anything on the Internet, he posts a message in the hopes that an expert might reply. Relatively quickly, paleontologist Cat Stone (Jenny McShane) makes her way to Mexico to search out the creature in the hopes of finding the supposedly extinct animal. When the shark attacks and kills a man just off a resort beach, Ben and Cat team up to keep the beaches safe. All hell starts to break loose when a high-tech energy company decides to unveil its new yacht at the resort...

Having just reviewed Shark Attack 2 (linked above), I thought I was prepared for what I'd be seeing in this third installment. Because I didn't absolutely hate the second film, I thought I might actually give the third one a chance at offering something better than drivel, but boy was I wrong. This one's about as bad as they come, and I couldn't have possibly found it any more enjoyable. I had heard stories about how bad this film actually is, and it took its inclusion in the following video to prove that point to me (although, it only made me want to watch it even more):

As you can see, it's two "wins" should really sum up the ridiculousness of Shark Attack 3. Let's start with screenplay, shall we? It's probably the most effective part of the film, but it's still so horrendous that it doesn't say much for the other facets of the movie. The story itself is rote and predictable, but it's the dialogue that really brings this one down (or brings it up, if you're looking for comedy). Not one line seemed realistic, and I realize that's the fault of the screenplay and not the actors. I know I'm a bit of a stickler for realistic dialogue, but if it doesn't sound like something someone would actually say, then you're losing points in my book. (Oh, and if you watched that above video, you're probably still reeling from the clip with that oh-so-random line. Seeing it within the constructs of the film makes it all the more amazingly out there, believe me you.)

The acting itself is pretty bad as well, with special mention going to our two leads in Barrowman and McShane. They're pretty awful, but I suppose that's expected with a film like this. We also get some bad performances from the likes of Ryan Cutrona and Bashar Rahal in their supporting roles.

However, the real prize of "badness" needs to go to the special effects. As you can see in the above video and the picture below, the "effects" relied heavily on real-life footage of sharks made to look massive by placing them into real-life shots of the cast. It's a little difficult to explain, but hopefully you can get a sense of it from the videos I've supplied.

Overall, there's really nothing redeeming about this film as a thriller, but it's a pretty successful, unintentional comedy. I know that's not what the filmmakers probably want to hear, but I think that's how it's gone down in the annals of film history. It definitely falls into the category of "so bad, it's good," but I'm not quite sure I'd ever want to give it another viewing. I suppose we'll have to wait and see.

Movie Review Summary:
Grade: F
1.5 Thumbs Down

Rankings
Worst All-Time: #19

Movie Review: SHARK ATTACK 2

SHARK ATTACK 2

2001
R

Shark Attack 2 is a 2001 thriller directed by David Worth that serves as a semi-direct sequel to the original 1999 film. When Michael Francisco (Danny Keogh), the owner of a new aquarium in Cape Town, South Africa, learns that a great white shark is trapped in an inlet, he enlists his chief marine biologist, Dr. Nick Harris (Thorsten Kaye), to capture the animal and make it a part of the aquarium's exhibit. Nick succeeds in doing so, but on opening day, a man falls into the shark's tank and is subsequently killed, forcing Nick to lose his job. He decides to go after the shark, which happened to escape the facility during the attack, to stop it from hurting anyone else. With the help of a woman named Samantha (Nikita Ager), whose sister was also killed by the shark, Nick sets out to exact revenge. However, he soon meets opposition from Francisco, who has hired the help of television personality Roy Bishop (Dan Metcalfe) to find and kill the shark. As the chase for the shark continues, Nick and Samantha learn that there might be even more of the creatures lurking in the waters around Cape Town, and they all seem to be afflicted with the same abnormality.

To be fair, I went into this film with the intention of finding something truly ridiculous, and I can honestly say that Shark Attack 2 does not disappoint. It's so ridiculous that I'm not entirely sure where I should start. I suppose I'll go with screenplay. Honestly, the storyline isn't all that ludicrous. It takes concepts from the first film - which ranks as the sixth worst film I've ever seen - and applies them relatively simply, but it doesn't hearken too much to that story too much. In a way, the characters in this film have to deal with the consequences of the events of the first film, making the storyline a little bit simpler and less convoluted.

That being said, there's very little that's original in this particular film. It's definitely a combination of 1975's Jaws and 1983's Jaws 3-D since we're centered around the opening of an aquarium. I couldn't begin to count just how many moments felt taken straight from that iconic 1975 film, even down to a zoom-in close-up of Thorsten Kaye that's a spitting image of the shot used with Roy Scheider's character in Jaws. There's even a few moments where the music dabbles a little into the iconic John Williams score. All in all, there's really nothing all that original about this film, and that's really what's holding it back from being "average."

The acting is definitely a notch up from the first Shark Attack film, but that's not really saying all that much. Still, Kaye and Ager border on "good" performances, whereas everyone else is a tad bit on the ridiculous side. My biggest problem with the acting, actually, was the fact that not one character had a South African accent despite the entire film being set in Cape Town. As time passed, we learned that some of the characters weren't actually from South Africa, but when you have the Cape Town mayor (played by Peter Butler) speaking just like an American, there's something a little bit wrong. Yeah, it's stretching a bit, but it was definitely noticeable. Oh, and Metcalfe's Australian accent was so forced that it was extremely laughable. I just couldn't believe him in the slightest.

Now while Shark Attack 2 is better than it's predecessor, it's definitely not the best of films. I wouldn't go as far to say that it's "so bad, it's good," mostly because it's not quite "bad." Mediocre, yes, but I wouldn't go as far as to say it's bad. There's definitely issues with originality and screenplay, and there's quite a few laughable moments, but I actually didn't hate it. Still, it's not quite a movie I would recommend you see, but if you've got ninety minutes to kill, you might find it a tad bit entertaining, if only so you can laugh at it.

Movie Review Summary:
Grade: F
0.5 Thumbs Down