Movie Review: A VERY HAROLD & KUMAR 3D CHRISTMAS

A VERY HAROLD & KUMAR 3D CHRISTMAS

2011
R


"Koreans have killed his mother and now his tree. Christmas is ruined."
-- Harold

A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas is a 2011 comedy directed by Todd Strauss-Schulson that serves as the third installment in the Harold & Kumar franchise and the first since 2008's Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay. This film shows the audience that Harold (John Cho) and Kumar (Kal Penn) have drifted apart over a number of years, after Harold married his longtime sweetheart Maria (Paula Garcés), but after a random package addressed to Harold appears on the doorstep of the two's old apartment, they're thrust into one of their old adventures. When Kumar goes to return the package, he learns that Harold is stuck in a feud with Maria's father (Danny Trejo), who is a stickler for having a perfect Christmas. While Maria and the family go to Midnight Mass, Harold agrees to decorate the tree. In a mishap similar to the ones they've had in the past, Harold and Kumar find themselves in desperate need of a new tree before the Mass ends.

When I first heard about the plans for another addition to the Harold & Kumar franchise, I have to admit I was skeptical about the prospects for its success. Having been a fan of the first film, I was sorely disappointed by the lackluster effort put forth in the franchise's second outing. Add the fact that this little number was announced to be in the third-dimension, and all bets were off on my thinking it might actually be a decent film. However, it actually garnered a series of positive reviews - the film currently holds a 72% approval rating on Rottentomatoes.com - so considering my affection towards the first film, I figured I'd give it a shot.

While the screenplay isn't exactly something to rave about, we're actually given a pleasant surprise. Like the other two films, our heroes' sole focus revolves around one particular desire - in this case, finding a replacement Christmas tree - but as they try to succeed in their plan, a slew of misadventures get in their way. While their adventures this time around hearken back to their standard drug- and alcohol-instilled scenarios of old, the addition of a bit of Christmas flavor brings a new bit of sugar and spice to the franchise. The screenwriters found a way to instill as many Christmas clichés as they can possibly conjure, and they all play to hilarious effect. We even get a bit of a drug-induced clay-mation sequence that ties in quite nicely.

Our central cast is just as good as it has been in the past. The reunion of Cho and Penn is a glorious one to behold, but there's a slew of smaller performances and cameos that definitely deserve mention as well. Trejo does a fantastic job in a limited role, and it's always a pleasure to see him on-screen. We're also getting great supporting performances from Thomas Lennon and Amir Blumenfeld (famous for his work at CollegeHumor.com). There are also some great performances from some of the smaller characters, but I think there's only one real reason that anyone should be ecstatic to see this movie: Neil Patrick Harris. Having appeared in the previous two installments, it was a safe bet that NPH would make another appearance this time around; however, his role this time was a little bit shorter than it has been in the past, but it just might be his funniest bit yet. We even get an appearance from his real-life partner David Burtka, as the two turn their real-life relationship on its ear. So to sum it all up, our ensemble cast is rather fantastic and proves to be simply hilarious.

But past all that, what's really fascinating is that, in between all the raunchiness and irreverent humor, there's a little bit of heart that shines through it all. It's a nice touch, and it's not something we've seen in a Harold & Kumar film to this point, and I think that sets this one apart from its predecessors.

Movie Review Summary
Grade: B
1.5 Thumbs Up

Movie Review: THE BLACK MAMBA

THE BLACK MAMBA

2011

For the past couple months, Nike and the NBA have been hyping a short film by Robert Rodriguez that was going to be released over the NBA's All-Star Weekend. The short film, which stars Los Angeles Laker Kobe Bryant, is posted below, for your viewing pleasure. My review after the break:

Now that you've (hopefully) watched the video - it's just under six minutes long, so just watch it if you haven't already - I hope that you found it as enjoyable as I did. Yes, I know it's pretty ridiculous, but it has that signature feel of a Robert Rodriguez venture that I absolutely love.

Sure, the story's a little lame, but it's still well-rounded considering how short the movie is. The Boss (Kanye West) wants to take all the power away from the best basketball players in the world, and the Black Mamba (Bryant) is the only one who's eluded his capture. So The Boss sets up a final trial that he hopes the Mamba can't pass, and for a moment, it looks like he might get the best of our hero. You'll have to watch to see what happens.

In terms of acting, I wasn't terribly turned off. Kobe does pretty well with the dialogue he's given - the dialogue throughout the film is snappy and very well-written, as is the norm with Rodriguez fare. Sure, he's not an actor by any means, but I think he did a pretty good job for his first "foray" into the medium. We've got some great appearances from some big names like Bruce Willis and the ever-present Danny Trejo who play their parts to perfection. And even Kanye, who I don't particularly like, does well with his time on-screen.

Yes, this isn't my usual type of review considering I don't review the short films I see, but I felt compelled to do a little write-up for "The Black Mamba." It was ridiculous and far-fetched but wholly entertaining, especially for under six minutes. Kudos, Mr. Rodriguez. You didn't disappoint.

Movie Review Summary:

Grade: B
2 Thumbs Up

Movie Review: PREDATORS

PREDATORS

2010
R

You can watch the trailer here

In case you haven't noticed, the lack of original thought in Hollywood has led to a slew of sequels, remakes and reboots, which probably led to the eventual green-light for the production of Predators. Although I'm not a die-hard fan of Arnie's 1987 original - I've seen it before, but it's been ages - I remember finding it at least moderately entertaining, and it had a rather clever premise. In crafting this semi-sequel, semi-reboot, director Nimród Antal tried to capture some of that entertainment.

Sparing any type of a prologue, the audience is immediately thrust into the action as we see a man plunging towards the earth but managing to activate his parachute just before he hits the highest peaks of the treetops below. Once he lands on terra firma, we meet this unnamed soldier (Adrien Brody) as he watches more people fall from the sky. Once everyone is accounted for, we find eight people - four soldiers, one drug cartel henchman, one Japanese mob guy, one death row inmate, and a doctor - now stranded in a jungle they do not recognize. The only female in the group, a similarly unnamed soldier (Alice Braga), suggests that the group stay together because there's strength in numbers. And so, the crew sets out, trying to figure out where they are. However, they soon realize they are no longer on Earth and instead have been taken to another planet that's used as a type of game preserve, and they are now the game. Action - and a bit of unwanted hilarity - ensues as the group does their best to compete against the "predators" hunting them around the planet.

I think it goes without saying that there's not much of a screenplay to talk about here. It's basically your standard action flick with a few good fighting sequences that are much too seldom and too far in-between. The dialogue isn't anything to applaud, but it suits the context of the movie. Of course, there will always be the one guy who seemingly and inexplicably knows everything - enter Adrien Brody, everyone - and as a result becomes the unwilling leader of the group. Some people live, most people die; I think you know how these types of movies go by now.

At least there's a little redemption from the characters. The acting is "action movie good," but if you put this level of performance into a drama, I'd laugh it out of the theater. All of the characters are distinct and different from one another, but there's so many different people that you never really get a good insight into any of them, aside from Brody, Braga and Topher Grace. (By the way, I just want it to be publicly known that I'm not a fan of Mr. Grace. I couldn't tell you what it is about him that I don't like, but something just doesn't rub me the right way about him. I mean, aside from the fact that he's a terrible actor. He's not quite at the Shia LaBeouf level of hatred, but he's close.) We do get a small role from Machete himself, Danny Trejo, but when he's -- SPOILER ALERT -- out of the film in the first twenty minutes, -- SPOILER ALERT -- you know you're not in for much of a quality flick.

It's not that the movie is bad; in fact, it's even entertaining at times. But there are quite a few scenes that will leave you a little bit bored, wondering when the next predator is going to rip some guy's spinal cord from his body. If you're a fan of the original, I'm sure it's worth watching this installment, but it's not going to blow you away. For what it is, it's a decent flick, but it's not really going to stick with you for a long time.

Movie Review Summary:
Grade: C
1 Thumb Up

Movie Review: ANACONDA

ANACONDA

1997
PG-13


You can watch the trailer here

It's amazing how many big-name celebrities can fit into a pile of (insert necessary term here).

Usually when a movie is this bad, I like to start with the things that went wrong and end with the things that went right, so as to salvage some of the movie's respect. Unfortunately for Anaconda, there didn't seem to be much positive anywhere I looked. For starters, we've got a screenplay that's essentially Jaws in the Amazon. The only difference is that Jaws was actually compelling, with interesting characters and a real sense of thrill. Anaconda was just flat. Bad job, director Luis Llosa.

Oh, and the acting was impeccable! (Read: sarcasm). We're given a string of some big-named individuals: Jennifer Lopez, Ice Cube, Jon Voight, Owen Wilson, Jonathan Hyde, and even a cameo from a young Danny Trejo. It's not that the acting was horrendous; most of the actors were just playing their normal character, so it wasn't much of a stretch for any of them. However, Voight, our villain aside from the giant friggin' snake swimming around, was absolutely horrendous. He had an accent that I couldn't even come close to placing, and his timing of speech made it sound like he had to call for his line every five seconds. I couldn't help but laugh every time he said a word because it was just too ridiculous.

To top it all off, we have to look at the titular creature itself. The anaconda doesn't even remotely resemble anything actually living. At least, when it wasn't in CGI. The computer-generation was actually pretty good, especially when it showed the snakes in full rather than just the head. They got the movement down just right, I think. However, the puppet-type anacondas that interact directly with the people on-screen looked so fake that I just couldn't take them seriously.

Overall, this movie is a complete train wreck. There's nothing truly redeeming about it. It's boring, and at best, you're going to laugh where they wanted you to be scared. You'll get more of a thrill searching real anaconda videos on YouTube.

Movie Review Summary:
Grade: F
Current All-Time Rank: Worst - #77
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